The day that forever changed my life. Katie's story Part 4

By the end of June I had been given generous baby showers, had a home full of baby items and a HUGE stomach. I was ready to start the adventure of motherhood.

On the morning of June 20th (after going into labor two weeks earlier than planned), I was wheeled into the operating room where my life from that moment on would be forever changed.

They started the c-section and within minutes we heard a little cry. Bryant quickly stood up, looked over the blue sheet and saw our Katie for the first time. We were both crying tears of joy. The doctor asked Bryant if he would like to cut the cord and he jumped at the opportunity to get a closer look at our sweet baby. After a few minutes he came back to my side to report how beautiful she was. She was only in the O.R. a short time, as they had to hurry and wheel her off to the intensive care unit to prepare for surgery. I remember them quickly wheeling her past me, but my eyes were full of tears and my glasses were crooked (having my arms strapped down did not help the situation), so I did not get a good look.

I remember while I was in the recovery room having this wave of complete euphoria come over me, a happiness I had never experienced before. Some say it's hormones, but I say it's the pure joy of bringing a new child into this world.

A few hours after her birth she had her first surgery. This one was to close her back where the spinal cord was being exposed. The surgery went fairly well. However, when the doctor came in to talk to us, he said that the nerve damage was worse than they originally thought. He then said, she would never be able to walk. When he said those words, once again the peace came as well as a feeling like his words were not true. I was not even phased by what he said. A very humbling experience to look back on. You would imagine if you were just told that your child would not have the use of her legs and never be able to walk that it would be a bit traumatic. But not one tear. It was such a miracle to be blessed with that peace.

About 24 hours after her birth, I was able to go to the NICU where I saw my new baby for the first time. She was beautiful and has such sweetness about her, that I recognized from the pregnancy. She was still recovering from her surgery and had tubes and IV’s in her body, but when I started to talk to her she responded right away to my voice.I wanted so badly to just pick her up and hold her in my arms, but I knew that I would have to wait. I had been told earlier that I would probably have to wait at least a few days until I would be able to hold her. That was tough.

However, Katie seemed to recover so quickly. Her tubes were removed the day after surgery and by the second day she was responding so well that when I was visiting her, the nurse said to me, “would you like to hold your baby now?” I just cried and whispered “yes”. I honestly will never forget the feeling of holding Katie for the first time. My dreams of becoming a mom had come true. I was a mother. I was now responsible for this little life. That can be an overwhelming thought sometimes.

It has now been close to six years since that day I held Katie in my arms for the first time. I always say that motherhood can be a roller coaster of emotions and sometimes that ride can start from day one. I felt like I was prepared for the birth of Katie and what was to come, but no one could prepare me for the love that I have for her.

I feel so blessed to be Katie’s mother. I find it a privilege of living with a miracle. Within three short years she was walking with the help of braces and a walker. A task that we had been told would be impossible.

I will never say that this is an easy road to go down. We have hard days. Some harder than others. Like the day we found out Katie's bladder and kidneys were having complications and we'd have to start cathing every four hours (I had just given birth to Ella and now had two babies. I remember wondering if I could really do this and handle it), a task that we continue to do each and every day (one in which she will eventually learn to do herself for the rest of her life, or until science comes up with a new procedure).

I would never wish for anyone to experience having to hand your child over to a doctor as he takes them away to the operating room. We have had to do that a handful of times and each time is just as hard as the first. At 14 months when she went in for hip and pelvis surgery, leaving her in a body cast for 3 months. Then again at 18 months when they placed a shunt in her head to help drain the excess spinal fluid that was building up on her brain (that was the hardest and most scariest time of my life). Last, a surgery to remove the hardware from her hips and at the same time they did a minor surgery on her ankle.

These past six years have been life changing to say the least. We have spent many hours at doctors and therapists and in doing so have met some amazing people with courageous stories themselves. We have been put in a world that not all get to experience. A world where patience is tested, where miracles are witnessed and strength is gained.
To the doctor that said: “God did not deal you a good hand.” My response will forever be: “No, He dealt me a GREAT hand.”